Forget about Confidence?

View PDF | Print View
by: GabrielAngelo
Total views: 5
Word Count: 498
Date: Thu, 10 Feb 2011 Time: 8:04 PM
0 comments

What is confidence supposed to be...for you can't see it? Confidence is definitely one of those things that has been around the longest in being the almighty secret to getting girls.

Now here is the thing people won't admit to you, confidence by itself is just not sufficient.

There is a distinction between "acting confident" ("faking it til you make it" as we like to put it) than "truly being confident".

"Faking it til you make it" is a great starting point and will assist give you the courage and self-beliefs to take action and persevere, but true confidence comes from when you're really good at something, unconscious competent, without even being awared of it.

Once that level of unconscious competent is achieved, confidence will naturally be there because you have the skill set and know you will be capable to do it well every time, contrasted to acting confident at what you are doing for a day doesn't signify you will be confident tomorrow because you don't possess that "competence to sustain it up every time".

Just like how you have been riding a bike all your life...

When you get on the bike, you are already confident because you know how to ride it; however that wasn't the norm the first time you got on the it. You were unconfident due to the fact you didn't know how to ride a bike and could had injured yourself, regardless if you faked your confidence, you would still have no clue of how to ride it.

Or basically for anything else, like taking a standardized test, fixing a car, playing a new sport...do you believe just having confidence is sufficient to make you do each one of them with the upmost success?

NO.

In reality it is reverse, knowing "what-to-do" and "how-to-do-it" and having the knowledge is going to create that competence and then confidence follows.

When applying for a job, do you think they will just hire you just because you are presenting yourself confidently without ever having the former training to skillfully work for them?

Absolutely not, because you could lose that job the next day after working with a lack of skill and have costed them time and resources. The factor they look at is specialized skill, knowledge, experience, expertise...your competence.

Now do you know why confidence alone is not enough when you are out in social environment and are unskilled of what to do when talking to women or interacting with people; you can fake your confidence and to look confident, but that doesn't mean you really are.

Confidence doesn't make you better, competence will, and confidence results from that.

Here is my quote, I want you to remember:

"Competence comes from experience. Confidence comes from competence."
- Gabriel Angelo

About the Author

Gabriel Angelo runs http://www.socialnatural.com, with the unique approach to dating and meeting women, by focusing on developing your "social skills" to be the most socially savvy person you can be, not just with women...but everybody. Although the arts are primarily related to dating and attracting women, they can be applied to other aspects of your life from social, dating, personal, and even professional.

For more information, please visit http://www.socialnatural.com.